Below are the 6 most recent journal entries recorded in Christie's LiveJournal:

Thursday, September 19th, 2002
12:37 am	whoa it's been a long time Hey all, sorry I kind of disappeared off of the planet for a while. Over a year. Wow. I feel old. I'm only 19 and I feel like an old fart with nothing to do but complain about the quality of life and think about how good the good ol' days were. I miss everyone at Eastern so much I cry about it all the time. I do realize it was my fault for getting pregnant and getting married and all, but sometimes I still like to think that fate played more of a role than I did. So there's the story of my life. A has-been. But I did get a gorgeous little girl out of it all. Natalie Grace. She is what makes me believe that perfection is attainable. She is only five and a half months old but I can tell she's gonna take the world by storm. But maybe all moms think that about their children. I did marry Tim, my boyfriend from that other life, but marriage is tough. Marriage to him is anyway. I don't think it's supposed to be tough in general. It's funny how I used to have this straightforward plan for my life and then all of this happened and I have no idea what the heck I'm doing tomorrow let alone next year. But I need to start making some decisions. I spent the day with a lieutenant on Ft.Lewis so I could figure out whether or not I wanted my ROTC scholarship back. I would love it but Tim isn't thrilled. Surprise. Anyway, maybe I'll do a better job of keeping up with this now that I'm a full-time mom and have nothing better to do than play on the computer all day. Until next time, I miss everyone at Eastern! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 4th, 2001
12:11 am	Life's Great I'm having a wonderful lately. I've been a bit busy with things and I haven't been studying as much as I should have, but it'll just be an off week for me. Today, I decided that I'm changing my major. It used to be Social Work but now it's going to be Counseling, Educational, and Developmental Psychology (translation: Applied Psychology). I realized that I never really read the courses under Social Work. During Block I and II, I'd be working from 8-5 everyday except Friday "performing various Social Work tasks." Did I plan on having a life? I still have huge minors I have to finish. Which is another thing, I've decided I'll have to be on the five year college plan. I'm not upset at all by it. I love college. And if I'll be taking classes that'll interest me, I'm all for that. Besides, it's one more year I get to postpone commissioning. I'll need another year to make sure I'm physically and mentally more able to handle being an officer. I found out that I didn't fail my government test. I was close, but I didn't fail. I was really excited about that. Next week is Greek Week and there'll be something going on every day so I'm super pumped about that. And my cheer squad is looking for two more girls to be on the squad and I talked one of my sorority sisters to try. Lacy is super sweet and it'll be tons of fun cheering with her. Tim is wonderful. Big plans happening with us, but I'll wait until next time to talk about it. Hope everyone's great. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, April 28th, 2001
1:46 am	What a Long Day I had two tests today and I know I did well on my Music one. My government one on the other hand, is very very questionable. I didn't study as much as I should have, but I was stressing out way too much over them so I decided to have some chill time. So I went down and watched Must See Thursday with Amanda and Brad. It was a lot of fun and it got my mind off of things for a while. I got my Biology test today, I got a 75%. On the progress report attached Professor McKean wrote that I still had a chance at a 4.0 in the class. That made my day. I guess the fact that Tim's here is supposed to be making me happy, but it's not. I've hardly seen him all day. His plane got in at 10:45 this morning and Amanda went to pick him up for me since I had class until twelve. He was here when I got back, we went to eat lunch at Baldys, then I left to decorate for Military Ball. By the time I got back, we were hurrying trying to get showered and dressed and pretty-looking. Amanda came with us because someone decided to flake out. Anyway, I didn't mind. Tim and I spent some time together at the dance, but he was drinking a lot of the time. It's not a bad thing, but he started to loosen up and get friendly with two of the girls that didn't have dates. But I guess that was okay too. Except I think I only danced two songs with him and I even missed out on the very last dance. Oh well. There's always two years from now. Since he'll be in Korea this time next year. All in all, Mil Ball wasn't great. There's an after party and I was going to go with Tim, Amber, and Maggie. But Maggie didn't want to go and I was too tired. I expected Tim to stay here, but he went anyway. So he's probably having a ton of fun drinking and hanging out with my ROTC friends. It's 1:51 am and I should be asleep since I have a long day today, but I can't sleep until Tim gets back. It's not that I'm worried anything will happen, but you never know when alcohol's involved. I've been so crabby with him and I don't know why. I just don't think I'm happy anymore. That can't be a good thing. Nine months together and I can't keep myself from being irritated with him. Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on the full experience of college because I'm being held back by Tim. I know that's a horrible way of looking at it, but lately I've felt so tied down. We haven't had the chance to talk about it, but I don't even know what I'd say. I love him, but life is so complicated right now, having him in it is really another stress-out factor. But at least I get to cheer. At least once a week, on Wednesdays, for two hours, I just get to cheer and dance. I love it. It is so relaxing. It's going to be a ton of fun and I really think we have a great squad for the upcoming year. I just need to know how I'm going to balance cheer with sorority with ROTC with trying to get my minors and my major within the next three years. I don't think that's going to happen though so I have to talk to Major Rich about a five year plan or something. I don't know how that'll work since I'm on scholarship. Well, there are a ton more things running through my head, but I'll leave them for another time. I hope everyone's well. Take care. Current Mood: sad Current Music: Baton Rouge by Garth Brooks (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 25th, 2001
11:33 pm	Is a Mental Breakdown at Age 18 Normal? I am being so crabby lately that I know I must be driving my roommate crazy. I'm being snappy and moody just because things are a little bit stressed right now. I went to cheer practice today and apparently they've planned "Cheer Weekend" the exact same weekend as my "Sorority Weekend" and "ROTC FTX Weekend." How does that manage to always happen? There are four weekends in a month and yet, everything always manages to fall on the same weekend. It sure does suck to have make decisions when each one is equally important. I think I'm going to have to go with Cheer though, since that weekend is Lilac Parade and we get to have uniform fittings. I'm getting my Biology test back on Friday and I'm really anxious. I don't think I aced the thing, but I definitely didn't fail it either. I have been in the library so much lately, they're gonna rename it after me. Next year doesn't look so free either. I've got 25 credits worth of classes every quarter. All my quarters are gonna be filled like that. I just happened to pick two of the biggest minors. I just have to remind myself that in three years, when I'm all done, it was worth it. I'll hopefully have a job I love in the Army. There weren't many listings for Social Workers in the Army. But they do exist. They deal more with the drug and alcohol abuse cases which is exactly why that's one of my minors. All this work is good for me. It'll make me feel like I've squeezed every last cent out of this education the Army is paying for. I'm feeling a little out of touch with everyone lately. I've been so caught up in what's going on in my life that I haven't really been able to reach out to anybody else. I've been spending a lot of time with my sorority lately so at least I'm not completely out of the loop. I've started to take the stairs in my dorm. It's fine when I'm going from the fifth floor to my room, but all the way up nine flights of stairs...I'm gonna have some killer legs by the end of the quarter. Too bad it sounds like I just got done running a marathon once I've finally made it to my floor. Well, I better get to bed. I've got a super long day of studying ahead of me. I hope everyone's weeks are going well and for those of you who get out of school soon...I envy you. I've still got 8 weeks to go! Good night. (Comment on this)
Sunday, April 22nd, 2001
2:33 pm	I need to study... I have three tests this week! Why is it that all your teachers give you tests at the same time? It's like they're just asking you to study your butt off and then get Math formulas mixed up with Music terms and Government definitions. What is the square root of 49? Um...when only one melody is played at a time? What is tempo? Uh...the process by which we elect a president? Makes sense to me. I'm downstairs typing on Bogie's keyboard. I like the buttons on it because they're loud. I wish my keyboard was like that. I wish it was Friday at noon. Because then I'd be done with all of my tests and it'll be time to get ready for Military Ball and Tim'll be here! Bogie's gonna be great enough and go pick him up from the airport since I'll be in classes for another hour and a half before I can pick him up. My stomach hurts because I did my ab roller and leg lifts the other night. I can't laugh or stretch or breathe without it hurting. But that's what it's gonna take in order to ensure me looking semi-decent in that skimpy cheerleading uniform. I've got a month before fittings and four months before I have to squeeze into one of those things. I hate being on this floor and having to be so close to Treicia. She's a horrible person and the thought of her makes me want to punch a wall. That's another reason why I can't wait for Military Ball. She'll be there. I don't mind being around her because then I can ignore her. Does that make sense? She's the one who threw out unnecessary attitudes and now I'm the one to surprise her by staying upset. I'm normally the type of person to try and make up as soon as something happens. But I drew the line this time and I'm proud of myself for sticking to my beliefs that I did nothing to deserve her random act of meanness. Only another three years of looking at her. I can handle it. I am in the middle of a conversation about men in uniform. For Guys: Men in uniform are hot. Get one. For Girls: Men in uniform are hot. Get one. That's my advice for the day. Well, I better get up to my room and start studying about organelles and mitochondria. Current Mood: stressed (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, April 19th, 2001
11:25 pm	My First Entry Hey all. I'm not exactly sure how this works. A lot of people on the floor I used to live on have really sold me on this thing so I figured I might as well try it out. It's a way to get personal thoughts out and have other people respond, without me actually having to break down and talk about it in person. That's not usually the kind of person I am. I'd prefer it if my friends didn't know the inner workings of my mind. They'd never be able to figure me out. I don't want to make this first entry too long for fear of losing interest. The updates on this journal won't be too often because my life is way too cluttered with cheer practices, sorority meetings, ROTC labs, 21 credits worth of classes, and trying to have a "normal" life. Whatever that is. Normal is smiling all the time and being overly nice to everyone without caring that they step all over you? Or is normal hating the world and blaming everyone in it. To each his own I suppose. Normal is the "happy" medium between the two. Every Thursday I watch Must See TV. For those few hours, I get to step away from my life and drown myself in laughter and fun and carefree-ness, if that's a word. I sit around with my friends and we don't talk about tests and we don't stress about guys. I live for Thursday nights. Well, I'm gonna get to bed now. Thanks to those of you for reading. Current Mood: sleepy Current Music: SFP-My love is the shhh... (1 Comment |Comment on this)